Thursday, December 4, 2008

Turkey Day in Tennessee

Over the river and through the woods

To Grandmother’s house we go.

The hooptie van knows the way

To carry the babes through the windy, twisty roads. Oh!

Over the river and through the woods

Turkey’s calling our name.

The potatoes are hot,

Cranberries are not.

Oh will a deer be shot?

Over the river and through the woods

The toilet overflows.

Tree roots obstruct.

We’re out of luck.

To bathe down the road we must truck.

Over the river and through the woods

11 adults, 5 babes share one loo.

If we get in a pinch-

It isn’t a synch-

A chamber pot we must use…

Over the river and through the woods.

On the Wii we played.

To the good laughs we had-

When the plumbing went bad.

Hooray for Thanksgiving Day.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Tricks? or Treats?

Isabella gave Mommy a Halloween Eve treat: A Baby the bathtub. Yummy!

ha! I won't forget that for some time!

We had a great time cruising the neighborhood!
After the babies went to sleep I passed out candy while John sat in the dark garage making deer/turkey calls each time someone walked to our door. One mom was ready to take down the "creature" in our garage! It was pretty funny. The old trickster then decided the diaper pail full of dirty diapers needed to be opened and placed near our door... he wanted to see the looks on the poor childrens' faces while trying not to vomit in their plastic pumpkins. Well...if this isn't a sign of the times- I don't know what is... A teenage couple came to the door dressed in their costumes...They happily shouted, "Trick or Treat"...with the gusto of any excited child on this hallowed holiday. I then realized the boy had his newborn baby wrapped in a blanket strapped to his chest. When I shockingly asked, "Is that a baby?" "Yes," He answered..."He's ours." I guess there are worse things wild and crazy teenagers could do with their baby on Halloween night...i.e. take them rolling, take them to bonfire parties, take them to a haunted house...
I decided they were going to be our last customers for the evening- lights out!

I want to take this opportunity to publicly wish my baby brother a Happy 30th Birthday!

Isabella Fairy Princess....with Hives

Well, about 5 minutes before I put her costume on Isabella broke out into hives. Bless her heart!

Cowboy Ben

Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear, or a fool from any direction.

Cowboy Will

Don't squat with your spurs on.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Grape Stomp at winery

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Isabella actually rode the horse all around the property

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I'd stand on the saddle if you weren't looking...

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Ride a little horsey

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Trying to get 5 babies to look and smile-this is as good as it gets.

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Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History

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New playground

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Haven't figured out how to Flinstone the car

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Ben in his big boy boots

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Wow! I cannot believe It's almost been 3 months since I posted anything! The haze of a new school year has faded- so hopefully we can post more often! So much has happened! Will is a walking fool! I think I even saw him moon walk the other day. Ben and Isabella are now running! If they don't get a bump, bruise, or busted lip then we've had a great day! I'm not going to say much- the pics say it all!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Looks Like Somebody Robbed a Daycare

The top ten list of crazy comments made to us regarding our children from the home office in Hickory, NC.

10. Do you watch that TV show "John and Kate + 8"?
It's required watching for parents of multiples. (I also grew up next door to Florence and Richard + 10. We rode around in a van with no air conditioning.)

9. I guess you're finished having kids then...
Why? Are you worried about overpopulation?

8. I've never seen triplets before.
Well, now you can mark that one off your list.

7. Are they natural?
Nope. 100% processed. I found them in the grocery aisle next to the SPAM.

6. How did that happen?
Well, it all begins with a little thing called the birds and the bees.

5. What do you have? 3 boys? 3 girls? 2 girls and a boy?
2 in blue, 1 in pink- your guess is as good as mine.

4. Did you know you were having triplets?
No- they were having a buy 2 get one free sale in Labor and Delivery.

3. Are they identical?
No comment.

2. Better you than me!
You've got that right.

1. You've got your hands full!
Yep! Full of love!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

The Mosquito Culprit

Aha! I was watching a TV show this morning and it put together the pieces to the mosquito bite puzzle. CBS stated this morning:(CBS) Health officials in California say the foreclosures crisis may be adding a new wrinkle to the fight against the West Nile virus, as standing water in pools that are being left unattended in backyards of abandoned homes becomes a potent breeding ground for the mosquitoes that carry it.
As you will see in the picture above- our neighbors aren't going to receive the yard of the month award. No- it's not a foreclosure...people actually live there. The tree fell on their fence over 4 months's still there. Who knew this would cause a suburban neighborhood revolt. At any point an angry mob is going to run down our street with their pitchforks in hand to scalp this guy. We've met more neighbors since the tree fell...people come to our house up in arms at the state of our neighborhood. Everyone is afraid to confront the man. Some neighbors have theorized that he's a former Colombian Drug Cartel in the witness protection program.
What does this have to do with mosquitoes? Our neighbors, fearing that their home values were plummeting, came knocking on our door for answers. We found out that behind that broken fence lies an above ground pool that hasn't run in years-but it's full of green, murky water. Not only does it have a black cloud of mosquitoes lingering and multiplying over it- it's also full of frogs. Not only is the pool and tree a problem- apparently his septic system is spilling out into his yard and has been for a few years. No wonder my garden was so plentiful.
We called the health department and after being transfered 5 or 6 times we finally found someone who said the tree can cause rodent problems. What kind of rodents we asked? Rats, of course. I believe this is where the 11th plague of Egypt is incubating.
There's not enough Agent Orange on the Ho Chi Minh Trail to protect our kids from these mosquitoes. I'm afraid if this continues the little blood suckers are going to carry Isabella off like the flying monkeys in The Wizard of Oz.
I'll keep you posted on the outcome... I have to go deal with bigger problems... our credit card company just called and someone in Wisconsin is buying tvs at Best Buy with our card.
Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives.

On the Road Again

Lotta love in this elevator

Munner- smoking two at once

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Petting Zoo

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Sympathetic Gorilla

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Beach trip 2007 My how they've grown!

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The family

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I'm a Salty Dog

Ben's not sure what to think...

Will cruising for chicks

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Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Main Street Jonesborough

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Summer's out of reach

Okay- I'm a slacker. We've had a great summer and I've yet to share any of it with the 3 people that read this blog. It has been so much fun hanging with the babies. Now I'm down to less than a week at home with them. We are still nanny-less...I keep thinking Ed McMahon will show up with my Publisher's Clearinghouse check so I don't have to work anymore...he probably needs it more than I do now.

I'm recovering from surgery in a house with my Mom, Mother-in-law, 3 babies, one husband and as of 7 PM- no air conditioning...things could get ugly.

I'll fill you in on a few of our field trips this summer...
The beach:
We headed out to the "Grand" Strand to meet my Dad and Deborah on July 4th. Isabella threw up less than 30 minutes into the trip. Luckily for the babies we had the DVD player loaded with Wiggles videos to occupy the next 5 hours in the van...If you haven't heard "Fruit Salad, Yummy Yummy" sung by the Aussie sensation- you don't know what you are missing. We unloaded the car in the heat of the day and headed to the pool after baby-proofing the wicker-laden condo. You've never seen fireworks like M.B. on July 4th. As far as the eye can see on the beach are people who apparently cashed out mutual funds to buy fireworks and Budweiser. We had the best fireworks show from our balcony. They literally exploded at our eye level. John was caught in the crossfire and got hit in the arm by a stray missile. It left a bruise.
We stayed on the 14th floor and quickly realized that the babies did not like riding in the elevator- see video... the great thing about our hotel was that the elevator stopped on every floor which only prolonged the screaming fits of rage. (One note about staying on the 14th floor with 3 babies- I didn't sleep the entire time we were there. I knew they were going to get out on the deck and fall...even though they would have to climb out of their pack-n-plays, open the bedroom door, walk down the tile hall over numerous pieces of furniture, drag a chair over to the sliding door to unlock it- then pull it open... I was certain it could happen.)

Being at the beach with the babies was so much fun. It took 3 trips to get everything set up before we brought the babies down. John and I used to complain about dragging a heavy cooler through the sand when we were childless. Actually our system made the days at the beach quite enjoyable for all involved.
The babies loved the water and the sand. (Ben- not so much). They enjoyed dipping their graham crackers into the sand and shoving them into their mouths- then washing it down with a sand coated sippy cup. Mmmmmm.
Isabella was our little dare devil. She braved the waves like a babe on the cover of Surfer Magazine. Will loved it, too! He was into the babe watch with his dad and grandfather. Ben- hated the water!!!! He clung to me like a rabid raccoon. He was able to relax a little in the pool.
All in all- it was a great trip. John and I got time to ourselves. Grandparents got to spoil babies...We may even brave it again next year.

Our trip to Johnson City-
The babies enjoyed their first Rock Creek outing. (One of my favorite places). Mom and Bill were camping there and we went for a cookout. Munner joined us and provided the smoke for the campfire. The babies enjoyed the woods and the their first smores.
We also went to the Knoxville Zoo. We wanted to make sure that our children understood that animals were not just taxidermied decor that hangs in our house. We wanted to show them that animals also live in cages and behind thick plate glass. The babies loved it and so did we-although the triplets had their picture taken by as many people as the elephants. No- we aren't a roadside attraction.
I had no idea that our children might pick up bad habits from the animals in the zoo. The chimpanzees launched poop at us- missing us by an inch. They also have the same Elmo toy that our babies play with on a daily basis. Coincidence? I don't think so. That tells you a lot about the mentality of toddlers.
When we arrived at the gorilla habitat we were greeted by the caretaker. Apparently the gorillas became jealous and one slammed it's body against the glass right in front of us. I screamed- which scared Ben to death. He started crying. I think the gorilla felt badly about it because he came over and looked at us like he was remorsefull.

After a successful zoo trip we thought we'd try it again at the North Carolina Zoo. While a beautiful zoo- it's not condusive to a Peg Perego with 75 lbs. of babies in the middle of July. The exhibits are uphill both ways. We'll go back when the kiddos are old enough to walk the entire zoo and push mommy and daddy.

We coincided our trip to Lawrenceburg with the Boy Scout Conference in Nashville. We go to a farm to see cows- they were only at the fence once the entire time we were there. Our kids did enjoy watching the geese on the lake. The would point and say "gee". They also got the band back together with Isabella on the tupperware, Ben played the spoons and Will banged on the pots and pans. Grandmother, Grandaddy and Great Grandaddy Norwood watched the babies for a few days while John and I went to the conference. Although I almost had a nervous breakdown leaving the babies for the first time- that feeling seemed to diminish about 5 minutes after saying goodbye. I actually put on my grown-up hat and went out on the town. We stayed at the Opryland Hotel with 5,000 other professional Scouts and their angry wives. We actually sat down and ate grown up food. Our meals actually included conversation and lasted longer than 5 minutes. We got to see the author of Flags of our Fathers speak. Josh Turner sang (I think he sang- I was too busy staring at his blue eyes). Dr. Kevin Leman was the highlight of the trip. this guy is hilarious! check him out if you get a chance.
I slept in until 7 each morning. Let me tell ya- I was enjoying it!
I envisioned the rendevous with the babies to be a little more meaningful- they looked at me like i was a stranger. ha! I think they had a little too much fun and didn't want to go back with mean old mom.
Well- that's our summer in a nutshell. There were plenty more bug bites, etc. We did go to the Y a few times to swim...I envisioned that to be a daily occurance- but-it was a little more than I could handle by myself.
We are onto bigger and better things, Labor Day, Halloween, UT football... It's gonna be a great Fall! Only 180 more school days till next Summer!

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Santa Claus is Coming to Town

No- it's not Christmas in's just the new thing I've been singing to the kiddos when they do things like stand on the end table or use their siblings as a step stool to climb over the gate . This song takes on an entirely new meaning as a parent. I can really use this to threaten them from now on. They will soon be learning all about Santa... hmmm...I think I'm liking this Santa Claus thing.
My new theory is that Santa was created by exhausted parents of toddlers who had no other option than to invent a man who would bring toys if they had been "good" all year. Remember the list that's being checked twice? A total fabrication made by parents of toddlers.
Ben has been testing our ability to parent by climbing onto the end table and standing up with arms in the air. Each time we have to get him down and say "no". He then goes into a fit of hysterics. Well- today Will decides to climb out onto the table. Ben looked at him- looked at me- then looked at him and shook his head "no". He's getting the idea now!

Yesterday we were under strict orders from the doctor not to allow fresh air touch Isabella's skin...(j/k) but we did need to keep her cool so that the hives wouldn't act up. We decided what better way to spend a Saturday than at Big Lots. We had a birthday present to get, etc. We would be indoors with air conditioning. No chance of hives, right? Wrong. The power went out during a terrible storm and we were trapped in Big Lots for over an hour in the dark. What happens when the power goes out? The air goes out. Those places get warm fast without air. Isabella ended up with hives indoors. Ha!

Also- she cut 4 teeth this week. She has been in pain!

Anyways- babies are great today. We tried a new food today and they all tolerated it pretty well: edamame. Will didn't flick any of them- so he must like them.

Just remember: He sees you when your sleeping- he knows when you're awake...he knows if you've been bad or be good for goodness sake!

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Ants Marching

They're back.
The rains drove them into the shelter of our kitchen sink.
They can't be stopped by the exterminator. No chemical can stop the continuous stream of ants that enter our kitchen every summer. Last summer the babies drank bottles laced with ants. I credit the protein in our six-legged friends to the triplet's ability to develop like full term babies.

I now understand that Dave Matthew's wasn't spouting of metaphors about our society- he was literally talking about "Ants Marching".

Bug Bites Part Deux

Well, Isabella woke up this morning with a beard of hives and two swollen feet. After a few doses of Benadryl the swelling subsided- but not completely. I called the doctor at 8:30 this morning and when the call was returned at 3:20 they asked if I could make it there in 20 minutes. Sure- your office is 15 minutes away. I can fill the diaper bag, load the choo-choo, change three diapers, load three babies and make it there- no problem. Diaper change #1: big poopie; Diaper change #2: bigger poopie; Diaper change #3: even bigger poopie. (Whew- at least we got those out of the way). Babies loaded, choo-choo loaded, diaper bag loaded and we are on our way.

As the dark clouds began looming overhead and we were safely on the interstate I realized I was going into public. Did I put on deodorant today? Actually...did I shower today? Oh well- people will see me dragging the choo-choo into the office and understand why I'm in running shorts and a ratty t-shirt with bed head.

The doctor wrote two prescriptions and as I was leaving the rain began to fall.
The doctor helped me out to the car. We loaded three wet babies. Whew. Made it-
By this time it was 5:00. Dinner time for babies. I can run to the CVS drive-thru and zip home for dinner. It will take 30 minutes to fill the order...what?!?
My dilemma: Do I keep babies in the car and drive around for 30 min. or do I unload babies- feed them- load them back up and pick up the prescription? (John is out of town.) I chose the simplest choice- drive around for 30 min. We are driving around the back roads of Hickory when I smell a strange odor waifing towards the driver's seat. Again I think: deodorant? shower? I realize Isabella has thrown up all over herself. Ben is patting her to make her feel better. Oh, how sweet!
The 30 minutes are up and we get our prescription and head home. I check the rear view mirror one more time before we leave the CVS parking lot...Ben isn't patting Isabella- he's eating her throw up.
We are finally home-babies in bed- and I'm asking myself the question that continues to resonate with me: Is this karma or parenthood?

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Summer Vacation

A little over one week of vacation and I'm worn out. Staying at home with triplets is not for the faint of heart. I tried to be the overachieving mother the first week and it was too much.
This week we just aren't doing as much. As of today we have been confined to the indoors due to more bug bites. The babies and I ate dinner outside last night and played at the sand table. Within the 30 minutes that we were out there we were bombarded by mosquitoes. I thought the Vietnamese jungle proof DEET would be enough to stave the boogers off for awhile- but no... Will woke up this morning with one ear at least 3x as big as the other one. It was bright red and hot.
Isabella woke up covered head to toe in hives.
When I googled her symptoms this is what I found:

I hadn't had enough coffee at 6:15 to deal with that picture.
Ben took one right between the eyes.
So until the swelling subsides- it's indoor activities for the babies. Today we took our first trip to the grocery store. I pushed the cart and pulled the choo-choo. It went surprisingly well. I should enjoy these trips before they are old enough to express their desire for Fruity Pebbles and Fruit Loops.
If anyone out there knows of a town with NO mosquitoes- please notify us pronto. We can't take them anymore!